Easy like Sunday Morning

I awoke this morning to 89 tweets on my Twitter feed regarding the ash cloud situation. These can be summarised into the following categories. You may note that the messages are somewhat contradictory:
1. The volcanic explosion is ending / getting much stronger.
2. We won't be flying again this week / for 6 months / ever again as nuclear winter will fall and human extinction is a certainty. Or global cooling. Or global warming.
3. We can't fly safely / KLM and Lufthansa have been flying safely. My favourite is the 'successful' flight by a Urals flight which flew very well towards Italy, apart from running out of fuel and having to land at Vienna. Personally, I see this as Not A Good Thing aeronautically although it may have been A Good Thing sachertorte and kaffee wise for the crew.

So, as one in a million stranded people, how do I feel? I'm pretty certain I won't be seeing Manchester airport any time on Tuesday or Wednesday. I'm a wee bit concerned that Easyjet flights will resume and I'll be on the flight which discovers that the choke mechanism ( check my wholly absent knowledge of avionics) doesn't work. And we're on the world's heaviest glider.

This leads to the favoured conversation of the stranded: how else we could get home? My Dad is an acknowledged demagogue in this field and has provided a host of practical, sensible and cost-effective measures:
1. as Nick Clegg did well in the Leader's debate and we aren't going to get the Tories as the next government, he's never going back to the UK and is going to buy an apartment here as he likes the lamb. (He lives in Portugal but never mind).
2. We'll get to Venice by boat and catch the Orient Express back, I much prefer this to,
3. As Easyjet passengers we should get the Easycruise boat to come and get us. 'Unfortunately' as flights are grounded I doubt we'll get great onboard entertainment such as the Vengaboys. Quoits maybe. Or
4. Fly but at the moment we enter the ash cloud turn the engines off and we can glide. He assures me that a Canadian plane glided 400nm over the Atlantic to make a safe landing on the Azores with a mere 12 exploded wheels. Just one of the many times I wish he wasn't addicted to Black Box Recorder on Nat Geo.

So, for the foreseeable future I'm taking it easy like Sunday morning on my sunlounger (whilst obsessively checking Twitter).

Yamas!


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Location:Malia,Greece